Monday, July 31, 2006


This is the Charlie Man.


blogger will just not cooperate with me today. I am having the worst time trying to upload pictures. Anyone got any tips?

I just feel like being a grumpy bunny today. It's probably the heat. Grr.

Miami Vice

Well we saw Miami Vice last night. Originally when we heard there was going to be a Miami Vice movie, we both rolled our eyes, thinking it would be uber-cheesy, kinda like a Starsky & Hutch type remake. Then we heard it was being directed by Michael Mann. Then we saw a preview. Wow!

It was just as good as it looked from the previews. And not once did I hear J say "that gun wouldn't sound like that" or "those bullets wouldn't come from that gun". Heck, I didn't even get the "what gun is that?" pop quiz! What I'm getting at is that my husband really liked it. You probably will too.

Plus, Colin Farrell is super hot. He's definitely on my top 5 'freebie' list. Yum. I know some people think he's dirty, but he's just the right amount of dirty. Except for the smoking. But you know he'd be really good at it; that's why he's on my list. Isn't that why so many guys like Angelina Jolie?

Sunday, July 30, 2006

Purell ought to be issued along with vests and tazers

So last night J sees this guy turn left on red. Yes, that's illegal here too. So he lights the car up, and the guy pulls over to the left. Not to the right. Guy's already running on two strikes before J even gets out of the car. J runs the plates, comes back with a warrant from a county on the other side of the state. Warrant for drug charges, failure to appear. Warnings on the guy state he has violent tendencies. J's already thinking he's drunk.

J walks up, asks for ID. Guy is from the middle east, with a very heavy accent and limited understanding of English. Guy rummages through glove box, grabs envelope of paperwork and hands it to J. He says, "No, your ID." The guy motions that J should take the envelope. He says, "No, you get it." The guy finally says he has no ID. He's also not wearing his shoes. Driving in his socks. Several condoms are spilling out of the glove box. His fly is unzipped. But he's alone in the car. Maybe he just likes to practice ultra safe sex, even by himself.

I'd like to take a moment to note that a glove box, or a wallet, is NOT a safe place for condoms. The heat breaks down the latex. Keep it wrapped, kids.

So J goes back to write the ticket, and his backup keeps an eye on the car. He double checks that he is outside the pickup radius for the warrant, and goes back to give the guy his ticket. Backup says "hey is your mike on?" J says yes. Backup says nevermind. J gives the guy his ticket, has him sign it, and asks if they can search the car. Nothing comes up. So they send the guy on his way.

J is completing the requisite paperwork, and reaches for his pen. The backup says "That guy was digging for gold while you were writing his ticket. All the way up to the second knuckle." Jim realizes all too quickly that he is holding the same pen that he had the guy sign his ticket with. Ew. Pen immediately drops.

Obviously this isn't the first time J's been in a situation with a less than savory person. He goes through more hand sanitizer than his sister did when her first child was born. Which is a GREAT thing.

LAPD Wife has an article on policewives about the top 10 things that we wives hear from regular Joe citizens. One of them is an insinuation that we must be kinky girls; we like to play dress up with the uniforms, or we like to be handcuffed. I have heard the cuffing thing more times than I care to remember. Now, I'm not saying there's anything wrong with that. What you do in the privacy of your bedroom (or living room, or dining room, or kitchen) is your own business. More power to you. And being restrained is certainly one of the more 'vanilla' of the kinks out there.

But the other cops (or cops wives) reading this blog will know what I'm talking about when I say I don't want those filthy things anywhere NEAR me, especially in an intimate setting. His cuffs have been on more disgusting people. In fact, I think you ought to have autoclaves at the stations to sanitize them after picking up all the crack whores, the filthy drug dealers, the drunks who've puked on themselves, etc. Ew!

Saturday, July 29, 2006

the Purina Diet

I have a Golden Retriever & I was buying a large bag of Purina at Wal-Mart and was in line to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog. On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her.

Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned. I told her no; it was because I'd been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me. I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hardas he staggered out the door

Friday, July 28, 2006

I'll get you my pretty...

So Wednesday night/Thursday morning, J is out and gets a call for a disturbance in a bar parking lot. Off they go, to find this guy tearing into his girlfriend. Gotta love a domestic, especially in public. Girlfriend is being uncooperative though, so they can't get this guy on much except disturbing the peace. I will never understand this to my dying day. How you could let someone beat up on you and not throw him in jail...anyway, so they are going to let him go with a skin, and the guy starts getting real belligerent and cocky, doing that chest-puffing tough guy intimidation thing. Not so smart when you are out-numbered by guys with guns. So he ends up on his face against a column. Does it again, says something smartass. Face, meet trunk. Now he's going to spend the night in jail.

So J's taking him to the jail, and the guy starts calling him Dorothy. Not exactly sure why, but the guy is drunk. So J says something about "yeah sure you're a tough guy now that you're in the back seat. Keep talking like that when you get to jail" and the guy says something about his red shoes! Now, I'm sure J was pretty pissed at this guy at the time, but in the re-telling, I am laughing hysterically! I was begging him to tell me that the guy had said "And your little dog, too!" Drunk people are funny. Well I take that back, they make funny stories.

Unfortunately the story ends with us not being able to eat at a certain restaurant now, because the guy is the GM there....dammit! Oh well, at least it's not "Don't eat there because we saw the kitchen and it's filthy"...that's happened more than once. Or my favorite, "don't eat there; they're selling crack out the drive-thru" !!!

Breasticles again??? WTF?

This is getting ridiculous. What is this, national boob day? Ed will get the hugest kick out of this story though...

This afternoon, I get home from work and hubby wakes up. Before we get dinner with his parents, we decide to go shopping quickly to get him a few new pairs of shorts. It's terribly humid again, so I throw on a tank top, leave my jeans on (love casual Fridays!) and we go to Old Navy. He picks out two pairs, goes to try them on real quick before we leave. Good thing, too, because they were too big. So I run back out to get the right size. There's a guy with his wife and kids, wearing sunglasses in the store, and I'm pretty sure he's staring at me. The uncomfortable neck position kinda gave it away. But I ignore it, grab the shorts, and go back. There he is again. *ugh*. J decides he wants them, we walk out. He goes to look at one more thing, and as soon as he's out of view, like magic here comes my blind friend. Still staring. But I tend to be a bit paranoid in public, so I dismiss it as me making it up. He is, after all, wearing sunglasses. Maybe he's a vampire. Who knows.

We go up to the register, and J takes a detour toward yet another display of shorts. And he's the one who wanted to hurry out of the store! But hey, if he's wandering, I'm taking advantage. I wander over to the women's clothes. I'll be damned if this guy wasn't stalking me! It's not like Old Navy is a boutique store! Anyway, then an employee is buzzing around, and says "Are you finding everything OK?"

Now, I worked at Old Navy in college, and I know it's policy to address your customers. Plus I don't need help shopping today, so I reply, "Yeah, thanks."

She says, in a conspiratorial tone, "Hey come here, I need to tell you something."

My gut reaction is that this is a sneaky sales pitch for her to get me to sign up for a credit card. Why? Because I already fell for it there. You get money back!

Anyway, she comes around the display and whispers to me, "I just wanted to let you know that your shirt is pretty see-through."


So I respond, "Well that explains quite a bit then!" She laughs and says "I'd want someone to tell me if it was me so I figured I'd tell you." I said "I just can't believe my husband didn't tell me before we left the house!"

It's a good thing I'd spotted a comfy looking shirt not two minutes before hand. Ha ha, now I get to buy something today too!

Naturally, DH thinks this is the funniest thing in the world. But hey, at least I was right about the guy staring at me!

Ed will find this hysterical because when we were in college, he always used to yell at me for wearing a tank top without a bra.

I'm done with boobs, I swear!


OK so Babytalk magazine ran an issue of its magazine with a baby breastfeeding on the cover. Other than the fact that a baby wouldn't be feeding from anything on your body other than a breast, you can't even tell it's a breast. That could be a kid with its mouth on a fat arm.

All these people are freaking out about it. I mean, readers of the magazine! Mothers! With babies! That may or may not have breastfed! You have GOT to be kidding me, right? What's obscene about that? WHO CARES? If I see a woman breastfeeding in public, and I have very recently, I will look the other way out of respect for her. Not that I care, nor do I care if Jim sees it. I just figure she doesn't want people staring at her feeding her kid. I'm not going to block anybody's eyes or point her out or run away.

One of the readers wrote in to say that she didn't want her 13 year old son looking at it, because breasts are sexual.

I thought this was 2006, not 1706. This same woman probably thinks adulterers should wear scarlet letters on their chests, too.

I know there's always going to be perverts, but if we would stop 'putting the breast on a pedestal', to paraphrase 40-yr-old Virgin, it wouldn't be this exalted, never-before-seen, erotic fantasy world. It would just be a boob. Talk to any straight woman who has wondered why men are so obsessed with them, and you'll get the same response. "They're just tits."


Not pregnant.

Why is it all these stupid fucking trashy people get pregnant ALL THE TIME; the drugged up 18 year olds who don't even WANT a kid, who can't afford one, who SHOULDN'T EVER BE ALLOWED TO BREED??

But when decent people of decent means, of a decent age, who want kids, can't?

I mean, what the FUCK?

Thursday, July 27, 2006

My friend, my friend, he's got a wife

Yup, that's me. Shooting a friend's AR15 out in Apache Junction, AZ.

So J's uncle, who's also a cop, was relaying a story of how his wife, hereafter referred to as Aunt C, freaked out one night while he was out of town. She heard noise, grabbed a gun and a phone, and crawled out on the roof of their house. Called her son-in-law as 'back-up' (he drives a delivery truck) and waited. Nobody was in the house, so it was quite an amusing story. Especially picturing Aunt C (who's a little goofy but terribly lovable) in her nightgown on the roof.
There have been times when I have heard a noise, one or both of the dogs freaked out, and of course I grabbed one of the guns and went to investigate. But I've been trained to use them, too. If I hadn't ever fired a gun before, my husband would have taught me gun safety and usage anyway. Plus it's usually recommended that you familiarize your spouse with your weapons anyway, right? I guess I don't really think about it that much.

Except last week, when we found out our neighbor had been robbed at gun-point on the front porch. This was when we were still dog-watching my mom's two boys, and I have no doubt this was one of the (many) times they went bonkers when I was trying to sleep. I said to J, "What specifically do I do if someone is actually breaking into the house?"

His response? "Shoot them. Empty the clip. Don't warn them. Ask if it's me, and if it's not, they shouldn't be in the house. Shoot."

I don't think I would be scared of doing something if I absolutely had to, but it was kind of one of those moments where you go, "Holy crap." You actually start thinking very seriously about the whatifs. Would I actually kill someone for breaking into my house? Given that the dogs would probably alert me and the intruder, I somehow doubt this would ever happen. If someone is just breaking in to see what they can steal, I have a guess they're going to scram before anything happens. But what if?

My SIL is terrified of the guns. She hates to even see them when he takes them off. I personally think the fear is caused by not knowing anything about them. You can respect guns without fearing them. But right now she's not at a place where she can be more comfortable with them.

So I guess I'm wondering how you feel about it.
If you're a cop, have you/would you train your spouse? Do you expect them to be comfortable with a weapon? What if the above situation happened; what would you advise them to do?
If you're a spouse, do you know how to use the gun(s) correctly? Have you practiced? Are you comfortable?
If you're not in a cop family, how do you feel about guns?

Isn't she cute?

This is me as a wee baby. That's my Grammy. I can't figure out why all the pictures of me at that age are so blurry. Maybe cameras just sucked then. Boy I was cute though!

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

A story from the badge

So apparently last night wasn't completely without some amusement. I'd like to share with you the story that he shared with me from last night.

Someone called in to report a car with two passed out teenagers in it. J and two other deputies show up. The one in the driver's side is half out of the vehicle. There's puke all over the place. J walks up to the passenger side.


(drunk teen 1) "uh...wha?"
J: "Get UP!"
(Jim says he looks about 12, smells distinctly of beer)
J: "How old are you?"
Teen: "From that movie?"
J: "No. How old are you?"
Teen: "From over there!"
J: "What the hell? How OLD are you?"
Teen: "From that movie!!"
J: "What the fuck are you talkinga bout, dude? How old are you?"
Teen: "Um..."
J: "Do you have your ID on you?"
Teen: "Oh!"

Kid's 19. Had split a six-pack of Bud-Light and two Steel Reserves with his buddy, who's equally inebriated. Obviously so drunk he can't understand a simple question. Meanwhile, Sgt is interviewing other kid, who's ready to ralph sitting on the tailgate of the truck. She says to him, "If you need to puke, you'll probably feel better if you just do it." He says "No, that's OK." And tips over to fart. Both kids start giggling.

I'm starting to wonder if both of them weren't also high, but that's just me. After writing the tickets for them, the deputies make them walk over to their friend's house with the promise that they won't drive ANYTHING, even a tricycle. And that's a quote.

Miscellaneous Rodriguez

Title of the blog today comes to you courtesy of a small family-owned Mexican grocery found in the city.

I like this guy. He's very amusing. I am giving him an official link because I was cracking up today reading his blog.

Shell Station


how did I not notice this entire time that my blog fucked itself up? This is supposed to say that there was a shootout at the Shell Station by my house. Within walking distance. I don't know where that part of the post went, though...Shootout

**end edit**

Lance Bass is gay. SHOCK! Didn’t he date some hollywood girls? Like Paris? Needless to say, I never saw this one coming. Really. And seriously, it really does need headline status on

Andrea Yates found not guilty by reason of insanity. Really? No kidding. I guess I thought mothers normally drowned their kids in the bathtub.

J had a quiet night followed by court this morning. It was a motion to suppress hearing, on a case he only showed up at to support the responding officer. He wasn’t really sure why he was there. Five minutes after it was scheduled, he called and said thankfully the prosecutor didn’t know why he was supposed to be there either. So he actually got to go home and go to sleep.

Post from 7/25/06

Whoops, forgot to add the blog yesterday.

Well, I'm not positive, but I think I'm pregnant. My boobs are huge (comparatively speaking, of course. I'm not a big person to begin with), I'm exhausted, and well, let's just say we've been very active lately, so the chances are pretty strong. I don't want to ge all excited and hyped up if I'm not, but I guess it's too late.

My cousin's baby was born late last week. He is HUGE! And he looks just like his daddy. However, they posted a bunch of photos to shutterfly, and there's one photo which is a bit questionable. I understand the fact that in the delivery room, you're in a pretty compromising position, but I'm wondering if she knew what she was posting when she threw them up. I told J if a photo like that of me is ever put on the internet, it would be grounds for divorce.

I bought another book Monday night, "The Thinking Woman's guide to a Better Birth." I am one of those people that likes to be as educated as possible about things i'm getting into, and this book is pretty in depth about different approaches to birth, such as elective c-sections, labor induction, mid-wives, epidurals, etc. And it has quite an exhaustive appendix of sources cited, studies used, and supporting professionals. I already had the initial reaction that hey, women have been giving birth since time immemorial, so just let it happen the way it's supposed to happen. This book is helping to solidify that philosophy for me. Basically (right now, anyway) I feel like I don't want medical intervention (i.e. surgery) unless it's absolutely necessary. I don't want to have a cesarean, I don't want to be flat on my back, I don't want chemical induction, etc. Now, if it comes down to it, and my hips just aren't big enough, or the baby is backwards, breech, in distress; fine, cut her out. But I have a hard time with having medical treatments "Just because," and that includes cutting a baby out. Hell, I don't even want to have my metal illings replaced with ceramic ones. This metal one is working just fine, thank you. If it starts to fall out or disintegrate, we'll talk then.

The book talks a lot about the use of oxytocin (Pitocin) to increase contraction strength, which increases pain but in theory decreases time in labor. I'm sure they don't tell you about the pain increase, though. They're just interested in speeding up the birth as fast as possible. Then women turn to epidurals to relieve the pain, which increases the need for Pitocin because your body just isn't reacting as well anymore to the contractions, plus you can't push as strongly..Basically obstetrics creates this vicious cycle of medical intervention for birth. I'm sorry, but women have been doing this FOR EVER! Plus, it used to be routine to give birth at home. I can't say as I'm going that route, because I'd like to be near the help if I need it. Nothing wrong with that. But it turns out there is actually no solid proof that maternal and infant mortality rates dropped when it became the norm to give birth in hospitals. They actually stayed the same, and in some cases, increased.

It's a neat book. My goal is to go about it as naturally as possible.

But things change. Plus, I could be just fat right now. I have been eating a lot lately....

Friday, July 21, 2006

Dear Penthouse Letters

haha, fooled you with that one. Was that mean?

I have a compendium of thoughts today....
First of all, how did I miss President Bush getting caught saying shit on tape? Apparently, it's all the buzz and I didn't hear a thing about it until this morning.

This video of the uber-viral mentos/soda 'myth' debunking is pretty amusing. Guys I work with already tried this stunt in back of the building...I can only say I wish I'd been notified before, but at least someone caught it on video and it's been circulating the department. The thing is to put a full package of mint mentos in a 2-liter of soda (apparently diet works better) and you have an instantaneous fountain of soda 15 feet in the air. It works for the same reason a root beer float does, only on steroids. I'm not going to link to them; go to Google video and search for mentos + soda. You'll have nothing short of a million videos to watch of people doing this.

Clerks II comes out today. Hubby and I want to see it. We're pretty big fans of Kevin Smith and the whole View Askew crew. I have to say that the funniest thing I've heard about this movie so far is that movie critic Joel Siegel walked out 40 minutes into the screening. Apparently he was being loud and obnoxious about a joke that he misunderstood, and didn't even stick around to hear the punch line. How is he going to review the movie now?

The Onion has some pretty amusing articles sometimes...Bush rolls back death toll in Iraq to zero.

Got the Post Secret book yesterday. Had dinner and pottery painting with several of the girls in my family. None of them had ever heard of PostSecret, so I shared the book with them and we all discussed if we knew what our own secret(s) would be, and if we knew how we'd decorate them. One cousin said she knew (almost immediately) what her secret would be. SIL still couldn't think of anything by the time the night was over. Fun exercise, though.

OK so last night (really this morning), the dogs all wake me up. It's roughly 5:15. And storming outside. So I figure either the storm is making them frazzled or they have to potty. I dutifully crawled out of bed, and we traipse (more like thunder; 18 legs isn't tiptoeing) down the stairs. All 4 dogs go out, do their business, and come back inside. I crawl back in bed, joined by my little girl pup, who snuggles right up to go back to sleep. Charlie flops down on his bed. JoJo, one of my dogs-in-law, tries to hop up on the bed, and due to his wet feet I kick him off. Repeat with Gio. Then Gio sits next to the bed whining and crying. I yell at him to lay down. A full size bed is barely enough for one person and one medium size dog, so the 90 lb lab/shepherd mix is going to have to suck it up on the floor. Whine, whine, whine. Then it stops. Miraculously there is 30 seconds of peaceful quiet. then I hear rain inside the house. Wait, we just had the roof replaced 3 months ago. That's not rain, THAT'S GIO PEEING IN MY HOUSE AGAIN. Apparently he hadn't gone outside. Now, if I hadn't let him out not LESS THAN 2 MINUTES PRIOR, I could see not being angry, especially if he tried to wake me and couldn't. But now I have been woken up two hours prior to my alarm, and I have to clean up stinky dog piss. Again this week. How am I going to go back to sleep after waking up enough to clean that up? I proceed to let fly a stream of colorful phrases. I put Gio in the crate so I can clean up without him in my face. Charlie is now hiding from my wrath in the back bedroom. Holly is standing close by, waiting for the appropriate moment to help me calm down. I think JoJo was hiding in the bathroom at this point. And Gio keeps whining. So now I'm thinking, maybe he didn't let it all out on my (fabric) chair and 90 year-old hardwood floors. I take him back ouside. the fucker takes a look around, and then has a seat on the porch. You have GOT to be kidding me! By the time I get him back inside, I am seeing red, and my blood pressure is so high I'm bordering on an aneurysm. Holly keeps giving me kisses and hugs and tries to get me to relax. She cuddled next to me until I got another nap of a half hour or so. Ugh.

So it wasn't the best start to my Friday. I would love to see video of Colin Farrell getting harangued by some random woman at a taping of the Tonight Show, though, so if anybody knows where to find it....

There have been quite a string of shootings, homicides, and accidents severe enough to shut down the freeway lately in it the heat wave? Or is it coincidence that they're all happening in immediate succession? I mean we're talking a shooting-related death three separate days in a row, and four (at least) severe accidents days in a row.

So since I posted this, Gio has attacked JoJo, his 'brother', once unprovoked, and attacked Charlie an hour later. Charlie was putting up a good fight though, and J and I were pretty scared. JoJo leaped into the fray and dragged Gio down by the scruff of his neck, which ended the fight after that. I was pretty impressed with JoJo's actions, since he tends to be below Gio in the pack order. I am beginning to fear something is wrong with Gio health-wise; perhaps his eyes or back or something. Dogs in pain are known to become aggressively defensive; this is why they tell you if you don't know what you're doing, not to approach a dog that's been hit by a car. And the first thing they dow ith seriously injured dogs is to muzzle them. I even know how to create an impromptu muzzle with a towel or t-shirt. So I call my mom to tell her this, and she snaps at me "I can't get him checked out now, I'm in the middle of Times Square."

Well no fucking shit, genius, I didn't expect you to fly back to Ohio from NY right this second. I had to hang up on her before I started yelling at her to stop being such a bitch. We aren't going to be able to watch her dogs anymore, because now I'm afraid he's going to bite one of us in a fight, or seriously injure Holly, who knows. I don't think he's going to bite one of us randomly, but when they jump into a fight like this, it's almost impossible to see it coming. And we've been standing right there with them half the time. I guess she's being defensive. But if she doesn't get some therapy soon, and stop acting out on all her rage, she's going to alienate herself pretty damn quickly.

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

If it pays a lot, there's a reason. it usually sucks.

Damn blogspot. I just composed a really good entry, only to have it disappear when I hit "publish". Grr.

Negative, Ghostrider has a good post today about the 9/11 movies coming out. you should read it. If only I could figure out how to permalink to the post...

J got forced into overtime again this morning. He works midnight to 8 am, and comes home to go to sleep on a normal day. This means he sleeps all day while I am at work, and is up around the time I come home. We have dinner, spend time together, run errands or watch TV. today he got stuck working till noon, which means he is dragging ass. And is still asleep at 6:30 while I write this post (again, I might add). I always accept this and work around it, but dammit I want to bitch about it today! I want to spend time with him! Thbbt.

OK, I'm done.

Clicked over to TechEBlog's top 5 Strangest Military Gadgets today. Pretty cool stuff. My favorite is the BigDog, but I can see the most benefit out of the Cornershot. Correct me if I am wrong, but doesn't it look like a regular handgun snaps into that thing? It basically enables you to fire around corners using a digital imager to see what's there. My main concern is that the targets are painted bright green, while civilians/hostages have red 'vests'. Do the targets need to be that distinctive from the non-targets? That could be pretty bad. But I could imagine the benefits would far outweigh the drawbacks of this weapon.

Monday, July 17, 2006

Sex, drugs & rock n roll. OK, no drugs.

Today I heard the song "Inside of You" by Hoobastank again. That song rocks! Kinda goes along with "Crazy Bitch" by Buckcherry.

J was off last night and again tonight. But we were talking about sexual harassment and he mentioned that if someone wasn't used to it, and they walked into the barn (their name for the station), they'd be horrified. I admit I am pretty used to crass discussions, and in the right mood I can add my own $.02, but technically that constitutes sexual harassment. I wouldn't personally be offended and report somebody for talking about general topics. But if I was really offended I would probably call that guy out on the floor and tell him to shut his mouth because he's being an idiot. Then again, I don't really have to worry about that kind of thing, working in the corporate world. I only have to worry about letting the occasional 4-letter word slip through. Jim, on the other hand, never has to watch his mouth at work. I have suggested to him that perhaps he ought to keep it clean around the public, but I think I got laughed at.

Anyway, I am not bothered by someone talking about general sex. I tend to not get offended by much until they start to talk about stereotyping, or talking down about women to perpetuate the "barefoot and pregnant" bullshit.

J says nobody does it as harassment. There are a few female deputies at his post, and they seem to chip in as much. I think that would be a common defense against it. I get that it's not intentional. But the line gets drawn when someone doesn't appreciate that kind of banter, and is too intimidated, I guess, to say something about it. It makes for an uncomfortable work environment. But it seems the guys were all like that at his last department, too. There were no female officers there. And firemen also tend to have potty mouths, at least in my limited experience. Is this something that perpetuates itself in a largely fraternal environment? Are most departments like that? Is it stress relief?

Anyway, the only time it becomes a problem is around our nieces, who are not-quite-2 and 4 1/2 years old. Since he doesn't have to watch his mouth at home, or at work, it seems to be next-to-impossible for him to watch it around the girls. Since the younger niece is at that "I repeat EVERYTHING" stage, it's a problem again. The best was when his sister called and left this message:
"Hey J it's your sister. I just had to let you know the choice phrase your niece used the other day, and I KNOW she learned it from you. And I quote, "Mommy, this movie is fucking silly. Thanks a lot." Click.

I had to laugh because in this family, J is definitely the only person who would use 'fucking silly'. If you've never heard the wav file "Usage of the word fuck", you definitely need to enlighten yourself. J has probably used it in every possible way. Adjective, adverb, noun, does it shock me that they all talk this way on his shift? Is it par for the course?

Saturday, July 15, 2006

Life of a Wife

Been surfing a lot of the other cop blogs out there, especially LAPD wife. Found this post, which is pretty damn funny and also really true. It's things that only a police spouse is bound to hear. I have to say the only one I haven't heard (or heard a variation of), is asking a prostitute what she's doing later. Then I read this post about police wives in the media. Made me think of the time I spoke to the news reporter outside the station (boy was J not happy about that) about the illustrious mayor of our little burg calling the police chief on the main line to the station (the lines are all taped going in and out) and calling my husband and a few other guys there assholes and bragging that they would soon be gone, etc. He was pissed because, shortly after attempting to get my husband and two other cops, as well as four of the firemen all laid off because he'd rather "kick off parades and kiss babies" than actually protect the people who elected him; well, he was pissed because then he tried to wave to J and (shock!) J didn't wave back. so he decided to call the station and start swearing up a storm, claiming he was being followed around town home from the bars, etc....anyway, I don't want to get into all that bullshit. But it made me realize it's probably a pretty good thing I didn't do this blog then. I would have used up all the free space blogger has to offer me with a lot of swear words. (Wouldn't you know it, I can't find an archived article anywhere about that situation.) Anyway, her post is really about how police wives are portrayed in Hollywood, and how we don't really fit any of those stereotypes. I have to say I don't think I've ever met a police wife who fits any of those stereotypes. No badge bunnies, only one partnership that was two officers, and, by and large, strong, supportive women with lives of their own. I'd like to think that I support J as much as I possibly can. I don't harangue him when he doesn't get chores done because of overtime (and the overwhelming need to actually attempt to get a few hours of decent sleep), I listen to him rant when he runs into the supreme a-holes on the street, and I try to be his best friend. God knows he is my best friend beyond anything I ever could have expected. I just hope I am being that for him.

Just found another blog, although it doesn't look like she updates very often.

Frone is a cute phonetic mis-spelling of freund, the german word for friend. You have to have seen the show Animaniacs when it was on to get the joke, but J's screenname, when we first met (in person, not online) was Fronelavin. Eventually I became Froneamy, and I've been Frone online for a long time now. So it seemed to fit when I started the blog. But in the process of nurturing this little blog, I'm seeing the need to change it. I'm debating changing the name of my blog to Badge Bunny. But I know that can be a derogatory term so I'm still debating it. Although he didn't become a cop until we'd been together five years already, J had always, from the day I met him, wanted to be a police officer. And we've been married over three years now, and he's been a cop for four. And I have to be honest, I like cops. They're great guys! They're hysterical, honest, hard working...hmm, seems like I have a theme of 'h' adjectives going have I become a badge bunny from being around them, seeing behind the scenes, and so on? Definitely. Have I become a badge bunny in the sense that I will go after a hot cop just because he's in uniform? Ew, no. nevermind the fact that I am married! But in the sense that I go after a cop whenever I'm in the mood? Well...I can only say he loves it!

I just realized I'm sitting here blogging in one of his academy t-shirts that I inherited when he got back. Yeah, I think I'm changing the name.

Dammit, I want a better cutesy nickname than badge bunny! why don't cops wives have a nickname this catchy?

Friday, July 14, 2006


Look, I found some other cop blogs! (this guy's funny) so's this guy. Plus my husband would love all his pop-culture references. YOU BOYS LIKE MEXICO???

The ups and downs of summer

Well my birthday was two weeks ago...considering it's been a month since I updated I guess that's not really a surprise. Lots of birthdays have been occurring. It was fairly good; we had a fire in the pit, Scott, Alison, Andrew, Justin, and my mom all came over. We went out after that, and boogied down. It was good. Then my mom got super-emotional from the alcohol at the end of the night and was crying about being pregnant with me at 21 so she couldn't drink, and why don't people like her, etc. I get that people do that when they drink, sometimes, but it was a lot to deal with. And it got in the way of J's amorous intentions that night, too. The following night we went out again, but this time she wasn't in a sad mood. She was easily pissed off, and the night ended with her yelling at some random guy. Yikes.
On the plus side, it's been two weeks since my birthday and I haven't lost any friends! Of course, when you don't have many friends it's statistically easier to not lose them's a good start to this year of my life.
Earlier this year, a police officer was shot in the face here in Cincinnati. The shooter was sentenced earlier this week, to 33 years in prison with no possibility of early release for good behavior. That's a relief, at least. She survived only because his gun malfunctioned when he tried to shoot her again. I cannot tell you how relieved I am that she survived, and how angry this makes me. She was shot because she was doing her job, and because she represented something this young man didn't like. You don't get that with many professions.
Another officer in Cincinnati was shot this week, but fortunately his vest saved him. He was shot in the abdomen when he tried to talk to a guy who was LITTERING! Honestly, pick the damn can up and throw it away, it's definitely not worth someone's life over it! I don't think J knows how much this shit scares me sometimes. I'm glad he works in an area of town where he doesn't get flipped off on a daily basis. I worry a little less. When he worked closer to the center of Cincinnati, well, let's just say this isn't a very police friendly city. At least they're doing something about the second shooter.
Finally signed up for my 401k yesterday. Why did I wait so long to do it? I'll tell you why, because you need a damn 40 hour course on learning what the hell you're actually getting into, that's why. 'Nuff said.

Well, it's a Friday night. I get my mom's two dogs on Sunday, since she and Cate are jetting off to NYC to dance. so I think I'm gonna go out....J had to work til noon today, he slept 8 hours and then woke up to go straight back to work at 9. Fun.

Oh, on another side note, I'm debating opening a myspace. Why? Because Ask Rocco has one, and Cate has one, and Nicole has one, and a couple businesses around town have one....and EVERYBODY'S DOING IT!